When it's spring again...

 

Hello all. I hope you are well. Before I go any further, I need to make clear that there will be little or no spiritual content in this blog. We have been away and I have not had one serious thought in my head all week. So, if you are here purely for the spiritual insight (as if) I would look away now. 

This was a week of firsts for HOH and me. First time on a cruise and first time in Amsterdam. This was all part of the same holiday you understand. We went on a short cruise to Amsterdam. The reasons were twofold (a) to see if we liked being on a cruise and (b) to stop our ongoing tendency towards shrivelling up and never leaving the house again. This is, I suppose, down to the advancement of old age and we have decided to fight it - a bit. When I say fight it, my ideal evening still involves a glass of wine, Cadbury's new mint chocolate bar, a documentary about the Princess of Wales and a blanket on my knee. I'm not fighting it that hard but I feel we should give it a go. 

I should maybe deal with Amsterdam first. What a lovely place. The couple of days we spent there weren't really enough. The weather was rubbish on one of the days, making walking any distance quite difficult in pouring rain so plans for a museum went out of the window to be replaced with a nice coffee shop (just coffee and apple cake - nothing dodgy) where a young woman asked if we wanted help with our map - which we were very impressed with.

We did take one tour - an evening walk finishing with a drink in a pub. The tour guide was very nice but I couldn't help thinking that she was expecting an entirely different group of people as she spent quite a long time pointing out shops where you could buy magic mushrooms, smoke marijuana or stare at ladies in windows. Maybe it was because we were all having a drink at the end but she needed to read the room better. Our group consisted of approximately five middle-aged couples, one lady from Australia and a mother-and-son combo. I spent the end of the evening chatting with a lady who was drinking coffee and very much looking forward to her coach trip to see some windmills the next day. Pretty low on the hedonism scale to be frank. HOH and I would like to go back sometime and do more of the things. Also, despite being on a predominantly British ship, we went four days with no one singing Tulips from Amsterdam. Disappointing frankly. I once had a conversation with FOW 2 about Max Bygraves - the singer of said song.

Me.       "He was a singer. He used to say "I wanna tell you a story" and he did this thing with his hands.

FOW2   "What thing?

I do an uncanny impression of Max Bygraves' hands.

FOW2   Why did he do that then?

Me.       What?

FOW2.  That thing with his hands?

Me.       I don't know really. It was just his thing

FOW2.  Oh. Was he a good singer?

Me.       Not really

FOW2.  Oh. Did Nana like him?

Me.       No. She said he was rubbish.

FOW2.  Oh

We should all be grateful for the Internet every single day because I'm not sure that Max Bygraves would cut it these days. 

Anyway - re the cruise. We liked it a lot more than we thought we would. Everything was very efficient. They took into account how clueless we were and delivered accordingly. The food was fine - excellent in some areas but mashed potato seemed to be a bridge too far. The cabin was very nice and we spent some pleasant time sitting on the balcony especially as, weirdly, the weather was really hot on the way out. We didn't go in the pool because it was the school holidays and all pools were like people soup. But there is a lot to be said for a cup of tea and a book with no guilt around spending time reading it.

Things were a bit more challenging on the way back because it was raining and, (is this snobby?) not many of the onboard attractions were hitting it for me. I don't like Bingo, ballroom dancing or having a massage with stones on my back. I don't want to listen to a lecture on the provenance of diamonds by Tony Cholony (check out the prices on his fabulous rings afterwards!). I didn't want to buy a Lowry. (Well I did but had come financially unprepared) and also thought that £9 was excessive for a bag of Maltesers. Everyone knows they are only £1 in B&Ms. I'm not asking for Taylor Swift or Simon Schama but when there is no telly something a bit interesting would have been nice. Fortunately, the morning was more than rescued by being able to watch the Lionesses in the pub but I can't help but wonder how I would have passed the time for two or three days when the weather wasn't spot on. Other than that. All good and would do it again. 

Just before I go. I just wanted to say a quick thank you to those who press "like" on Facebook or make a comment. I know it can be a faff but it is really appreciated. There are quite a few people that read this sometimes (according to the stats which I don't entirely understand but it is so nice to see names and smiley likes. So thanks again.  Have a good week.